What is Internal Family Systems?
Today, we are discussing one of my favorite therapeutic modalities and ways of looking at eating disorders, Internal Family Systems. Learn what this modality is, why it’s different from other therapy models, and how it can be helpful for looking at your eating disorder in a different way.
My first introduction to Internal Family Systems, IFS, was nearly 5 years ago when I first started seeing my current therapist, and it changed the way I look at myself and my experiences. Over the last year and a half, I’ve been utilizing this framework with my own therapy clients, and the shifts in their relationship with their eating disorders have been so cool to see!
What is Internal Family Systems (IFS)?
Internal Family Systems (IFS) is a non-pathologizing evidence-based psychotherapy model developed by psychotherapist Richard Schwartz in the 1980s. IFS asserts that everyone has a variety of different sub-personalities or Parts, that all work together, along with the core Self, to keep you, functioning and surviving. No, not Multiple Personality Disorder, or clinically known as Dissociative Identity Disorder. If you stop and think about it, most of us often talk in Language regularly.
One Part of me really wants to book a flight to a warm destination tomorrow and stay all weekend, while another Part knows that might not be the best choice to plan something on such short notice.
My favorite Pixar movies, Inside Out or Inside Out 2, do a great job of illustrating Part. Riley has different anthropomorphized emotions that take over the control center of her brain, depending on what’s going on in her life.
Therapist Jen Villaseñor, LMFT puts it well by stating,
“Internal Family Systems offer a unique, non-pathologizing approach to identifying underlying well-meaning protective functions of thoughts, emotions, behaviors, and physical sensations that other parts of us deem bad, maladaptive, or shameful. Just as a Marriage and Family Therapist works to help family members communicate their needs and to identify strategies that promote the well-being of the entire family system, an IFS therapist supports the well-being of our internal parts to ultimately open space for our true Self to take the lead in our internal system”
Components of IFS
There are 4 basic component Parts within IFS, Exiles, Proactive Protectors (Managers), Reactive Protectors (Firefighters), and The Self.
Exiles
These are vulnerable parts that carry emotional pain, trauma, or fear from the past. They are often young parts (single digits to teenage years) that have been isolated or "exiled" by the protective parts to shield the system from their intense feelings becoming too big or too overwhelming to your internal system.
EXAMPLE: You were a kid with big feelings, but your parents didn’t understand it and always said you were being ‘too sensitive’ or ‘too dramatic’.
Proactive Protectors
Also known as Managers, Proactive Protectors are doing everything they can to keep the Exiles contained, keep us safe, and keep our system running. These Protectors might take on the role of helping us fit in at school, improving our work performance, or taking care of other people instead of ourselves. Now, depending on our life experiences and circumstances, Proactive Protectors can take on extreme versions of their role.
EXAMPLE: Eating disorders typically fall within the Proactive Protector role. What might have started as simply trying to be healthy or working to lose weight to fit in at school, can, over time, take on the extreme role of an eating disorder. Remember that eating disorders are emotional management tools.
Reactive Protectors
Reactive Protectors, or Firefighters, come into play if a Manager has trouble containing an Exile or if the Exile’s wounding has become too big. The Firefighter's main goal is to distract or stop the emotional pain as quickly as possible and does not care about the consequences. They want to get your system back to baseline and safety immediately.
EXAMPLE: Common ways Firefighters work can be through binging, purging, self-harm, dissociation, and addiction.
The Self
Capital ‘S’ Self is who we are apart from Parts. Everyone has a Self. It cannot be damaged, does not go away, does not need to be developed (but rather nurtured), and possesses all the wisdom to heal our internal and external relationships.
When Parts form, they can oftentimes eclipse the Self. Imagine the Self to be the sun and Parts to be the moon. The sun is always there, the moon has just blocked its light and presence from view.
8 C’s of Self Energy
The Self embodies 8 different qualities that differentiate it from a Part.
Confidence
Courage
Compassion
Connectedness
Calm
Clarity
Curiosity
Creativity
Polarizations and Blending
As we move through life and Parts develop into extreme roles, there can be conflict over the best way to keep your system running smoothly and safely. Polarization occurs when two Managers fight over how best to protect an Exile.
EXAMPLE: Binging and restricting. One Manager might think restriction is the best way to Manage things while the other wants to binge to control
Blending occurs when a Part is undifferentiated from another Part or Self. Parts will blend when they believe they have to manage situations on their own or they don’t trust Self to do it.
EXAMPLE: Sometimes clients will say that their eating disorder is their identity or that it’s difficult to know what they actually want versus what their ED wants.
The Goals of IFS
Help Parts differentiate and find liberation from the roles they were forced into.
Befriend protector parts and get permission to help heal Exiles. (restore the Self and Self-leadership).
Cultivate positive relationships with Exiles, witness their experience, and help them let go of extreme beliefs and states.
Become more Self-led.
No Bad Parts
Imagine a conference table in a large office space and all your different parts are sitting at the table (or a council of parts sitting in a semicircle - this is another great and funny way to visualize parts!). They all have input on what you need, how your system should be running, how to help you, etc.
What often happens is when Parts get forced into extreme roles, one or multiple can end up sitting at the head of the table. Depending on what Part feels is best for your system, it can feel chaotic. The aim of IFS is to foster communication, healing, and collaboration among Parts with Self being at the head of the table.
It’s crucial to note that the IFS framework does not look at any Part as bad. By taking the time to understand Parts, fostering a relationship and collaboration with them, and bringing Self-energy to each interaction, we can see them in a different way.
A perfect example of this is in Inside Out 2. As Riley hits puberty, we get introduced to new emotions, including Anxiety, who proceeds to change things up via the control panel and take more control in Headquarters, aka, Riley’s brain. At the climax of the movie, we see frantic circles of orange threads around the control panel with a force so strong, that it’s difficult for any of the other emotions to step in, resulting in an anxiety attack for Riley. One of the emotions, Joy, breaks through the anxiety forcefield, we see Anxiety inside, paralyzed with fear, unable to move. Joy helps move Anxiety away from the control panel and then Anxiety utters 7 words that embody the role of Parts: “I was just trying to protect her.” (See the full scene here)
Your Parts are doing everything they can to protect you, keep you safe, and keep you surviving, even if the methods seem harmful, unconventional, or downright silly.
Parts often stay stuck at the age where they were first created and continue to operate from that perspective. We ask Parts how old they think the client is and the answer is often in the single digits or young adolescence. One important aspect of the healing process is to update these Parts on how you have changed and what you’ve been through.
And, Parts don’t ever leave, but they can take on new roles or rest. Many Parts tend to be exhausted as we get to know them more. They’ve been working so hard to protect you that they often want a break or a different role within your system. Eating disorders, for example, will always be around, but at some point, maybe it wants to nap for a few months. Or take on a different protective role within your system.
What is so great about IFS?
Non-pathologizing
One of the coolest things about IFS is that it is non-pathologizing. It allows clinicians and clients to look at and understand their eating disorders differently. Rather than working to rid clients of their ED, my goal is to help clients befriend and differentiate from their Parts while cultivating a collaborative relationship that helps them make sense of their experience and understand themselves more. I’ve seen incredible shifts in my clients and their relationship with their ED and other Parts by using this approach.
Collaborative
My clients are the experts of their own life. They know themselves far better than I ever could. As a clinician, I have different tools that can help clients make sense of themselves more and find healing and growth. IFS allows the clinician and client to work together in a supportive and collaborative way.
Understanding the System, Not Just the Symptoms
We might sound like a broken record, but it’s so important to know that eating disorders are emotional management tools. The behaviors are the tools that help tend to the emotional distress. If we only focus on eliminating the behaviors without understanding the utility and meaning behind them, we do our clients a disservice, and the risk of relapse increases.
By taking the time to understand a person’s internal system, why ED is in its role, what other Parts it works with, and how to help guide it toward healing, we give the client the tools and language to be able to recognize when Parts are activated and how to tend to them in appropriate ways moving forward.
Externalizing the Internal
Because folks can be blended with their eating disorder, it can sometimes be difficult to make any long-lasting shifts. By externalizing the ED - visualizing it as a version of you, imagining it’s a movie character, or using toy figurines that look like what your ED feels like - it gives some distance, which can give you the opportunity to engage with it in a new way.
I have clients with Parts that look like them, Parts that look like objects, or colors, movie characters, or woodland creatures. Externalizing Parts fosters creativity (one of the 8 C’s!) and helps make the experience individualized for the client.
Moving Forward
Below are some resources to get you started if you are interested in learning more about IFS. If you or someone you know is struggling with an eating disorder and needs help, reach out to the CCN team today!
IFS Resources:
Introduction Into Internal Family Systems by Richard C. Schwartz
No Bad Parts by Richard C. Schwartz
Unburdened Eating: Healing Your Relationships with Food and Your Body Using an Internal Family Systems by Jeanne Catanzaro (Dick Schawartz’s partner)
We Can Do Hard Things IFS Episode Part 1 and Part 2 (Dick leads hosts through the IFS process)
Resources Used:
Schwartz, R. (2023). No bad parts: Healing Trauma & Restoring Wholeness with the Internal Family Systems Model. Random House.
Anderson, F. G., Sweezy, M., Schwartz, R., & Schwartz, R. D. (2017). Internal Family Systems Skills Training Manual: Trauma-Informed Treatment for Anxiety, Depression, Ptsd & Substance Abuse.
Marcella. (2024, September 9). Exploring the benefits of Internal Family Systems (IFS). Kindful Body. https://www.kindfulbody.com/blog/exploring-the-benefits-of-internal-family-systems-ifs
